Crushing Krisis

Comic Books, Drag Race, & Life in New Zealand

my music

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Wow. I’m of the mind that your first kiss should be set in celluloid in your head to be replayed and replayed until all of the hiss and hum of the wear on the tape overcomes the memory, and you’re just left with a memory of a memory. At the same time, i detest those horrid contrived situations and wish they could all be forgotten about. Of course, if the two intersect…? I don’t know. This whole storytelling binge over at Benjy’s has got me paying rapt attention; and to think he was the one i didn’t like in the first week.

https://www.crushingkrisis.com/2001/08/4877628/

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i… i will wait past the fuss and the hustle that keeps me awake but it comes right down to faith you’ve got it in your eyes there are no surprises in store for you – until you awake

and i can see the good in all people except for in me but i never could be satisfied without someone like you to point these things out to me – until you awake

just another simple melody my hands wrung out of me but if it’s just the same i’d like to give it your name that is – until you awake

so you’ve got this guy who’d spend eternity with you right by your side but you’ve got to put up a fight to hold on night to night he will be waiting – until you awake

this is just another simple melody my hands wrung out of me but if it’s just the same to him i’d like to give it your name that is – until you awake

i had this bright idea to sit here and play until my voice wore thin but i don’t say the words that i really meant and it take you to get the page and the pen all syunced up again and i promise to stop thinking of you – when you awake

but i’ll keep playing this tune – until you awake

and i’d to finish soon – so please won’t you wake.

https://www.crushingkrisis.com/2001/07/4798661/

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This is a double a-side… like when the Beatles would release a single and both songs on it would go to #1. Only, not quite like that. “Until You Awake” is a song that i very specifically set out to write to have it be the last song of this, and i only just barely finished arranging it on Thursday in time to record it before going to bed. It’s a plain little waltz, but I believe in it more than anything else i’ve ever written, so please have some faith in what i’m singing. “Necessary Evil” was previewed to the notify list as far back as when i announced that i had intentions of doing this, and i keep on recording it but it’s beyond my current abilities… all i have to go on is this sparkling near-perfect original demo that i rehearsed for hours to record. This is the beginning and the end of 25/24, which turned out as 52/24 if i’m counting correctly.

Enjoy & Goodnight.

https://www.crushingkrisis.com/2001/07/4798495/

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(i honestly don’t know who’s got which guitar on this one except for i’m the one with the wrong note at the beginning, but here’s the lyrics from slowjam)

… i keep trying to take a step forward, but you are a hundred steps back, you know? but, i’m trying to find a new attitude, but i am finding you are making me sarcastic. and i can’t get rid of you even when i want to ’cause you’re deadweight because i carry you with me, deadweight the way i can’t leave you behind, deadweight the way i will keep running to you… for help… which you know you’ll deny me.

… you know i am looking out at the new horizon and your face, babe, eclipses it black. i’m looking forward to a whole new life, and you refuse to let me have it. i can’t get rid of you even when i want to ’cause you’re deadweight the way you serve no purpose, you’re deadweight the way you drag me down, deadweight the way i will keep needing you so bad that i will keep you around… one, two three, one – a one, two three…

…cut you loose, you tie me down! and you’re just like a noose, you know you’re tied around my neck! and i just want to ditch you; you do me no good. does it make me a bitch now? i hope it does: i’m loving every minute of it – i’m loving every minute of it. i can’t cut you loose, you drag me down. and, you’re just like a noose – oh – you’re tied around my neck. and i just – wanna – ditch you… you do me no good! does it make me a bitch now? ’cause i’m loving every minute of it, loving every minute of it, i am loving… loving!… two! three! four!

deadweight the way i carry you with me, and you’re deadweight the way i can’t leave you behind, and you’re deadweight the way i keep running to you for help: oh, you deny me again! deadweight the way you serve no purpose ,and you’re deadweight the way you drag me down, deadweight the way i keep needing you so bad that i keep you… i keep you around, yeah.

https://www.crushingkrisis.com/2001/07/4798231/

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“Deadweight” … it’s not the song i expected to have in the penultimate role, really. At first I was so convinced that “deadweight” was just some throw-away lyrics that i literally wrote it upside-down in the margins of a page with another song on it. You could hear that rhythm played a big part in the lyrics before i ever even know what the music was going to be like…. they have a certain kind of rise and fall to their layout. The riff couldn’t be simpler… C to Em, G to Asus, C to G, … all as simple as it gets. From the beginning i knew i liked it though, because it was explosive and loud and fun. I’m not quite sure what possessed Gina and i to have a collective go at it, as we typically avoid my faster songs, but we did, producing some lovely results. But, anyhow, at some point this year we had plenty of fast songs and so we started DeadWeight and just went into that holding patter over the chords until we were good and ready to get started, and away we went. And, that’s how it sounds now.

https://www.crushingkrisis.com/2001/07/4797970/