Crushing Krisis

More and more often i seem to be employing the bitch within to get things done. I’m not sure how okay i am with that, but i like the efficieny that goes along with it. A few people might consider me bossy or stubborn, but no one would classify me as a downright bitch ’cause i hardly ever exert my will that forcefully upon anything or anyone. Or maybe people do think i’m a bitch… i often wonder what other people think of me, since my exterior is so vastly different from my interior. I suppose i come off as a bit absent-minded, irreverant, and artsy, but i only partially subscribe to any of those traits. I can be absent-minded, but only about things that don’t matter to me (thus my expansive knowledge of musical trivia). I intend to be much more witty than irreverant, and while i certainly am artsy i’m actually quite a bit better at concrete science than i am abstract philosophy. Of course, the people at the coffee shop seem to think i can’t us the calculator we’ve got next to the register. They can go on thinking that, for all i care; i’m more worried about the people i refer to as my friends. Do any of them realize how much time i practice my guitar playing? They seem to mostly treat it as a whim a pull out at parties. Do they know that i can read three books in a day, did they think my empty head was better for listening to music? I’ve got to find a way to bring more of my insides out, because otherwise i won’t ever be that happy.

I think one of my new hobbies might become spying on the people across the street. So far one thing we haven’t bought for the apartment are blinds for the windows (other than that one in the bathtub), and our windows are on the front of the building looking out across the street. As it happens, the house across the street from us doesn’t seem to be too fond of the use of blinds either, which allows me to stare into their lives and visa versa. The windows looking in on the second floor of the house reveal a room painted a pretty green that is stocked with a computer and stereo. I’ve yet to spot anyone using either. The third floor is the dull yellow of an uncovered lightbulb, and so far i’ve seen a rather dumpy looking shirtless man walk back and forth a few times. I can never see his face.

Of course, in order to stare at these people, i’ve got to stand in the middle of a window and stare. Any random glance in my direction from the house across the street would reveal my rampant voyeurism, and i don’t think i’m smooth enough to pass my actions off as anything else.

Obviously i’ve got to get some mini-blinds to spy through before i wind up getting myself killed.

I’m now running Netscape 4.7 (since i’m still too much of a wuss to run the dreaded 6.0). Ironically, trying to download the upgrade through Netscape 4.61 would cause me total system failure. As a result, i was forced to download the whole thing (not just the upgrade) with MSIEX. I don’t know if i’ll ever be able to wash off the smell…

Blogger always has to go down when i have something to say.

We have a moth in our apartment that continuously flies in erratic circles around a bare lightbulb before veering nearly into it and then escaping to a cooler spot to sit and plot for its next attack. My vision’s all spotty from watching it go through this routine for the past hour because the lightbulb is directly in my line of site if i glance past my monitor.

Do you ever feel like that moth? I eventually proved that i was smarter than it by shutting off the light. I haven’t seen it since.

We’re losing our minds. Obviously sitting in this room for 8-10 hours a day is driving us a bit batty, but to add to the atmosphere yesterday they brought us about $100 worth of snack food and caffine. Right now we’re playting 20 Questions, but i see a massive game of hide-and-go-seek happening a little later. Either that or hunting down the two squirrels we saw running up the metal steps yesterday… we don’t have any sort of meat here to eat and the absence of it is even a bit discomforting to me (and i’m the vegetarian of the bunch.

Updates from the squirrel roast as soon as we locate some skewers.