Ha! I write about hickeys and my friends flood me with messages asking about this new love interest of mine. Nice, guys, very classy (in the way that voyeurism is classy) Do you really want to hear about my life? I think you must, since you snap up all the juicy bits. Here’s one to mull over: did i ever mention how i don’t feel like i have any friends? I mean… i have a few close ones that i value greatly, but for the most part all of the people i call friends are just people i generally associate with or have something random in common with me. Most of them don’t really know anything about me, like my bouts with anorexia, or how i’m convinced i’m bi-polar, or about my small cancer scare. Why? Because i never told them, because i don’t feel like i have that kind of connection to them. Or maybe i just made all of that shit up. Of course i mention it here and suddenly they’re all crawling down my throat trying to find out what’s happening.
Wow, i can be a bit harsh, can’t i? Oh well … this is my life … either take the heat or melt.
meta
So, i think last week’s archive might all might sense to you now that i’ve given you a frame of reference to view it within. I obviously was spending less time in the apartment than per usual, and i was being unusually cryptic about it because so many people i know in real life read this log. That’s why i posted that one really bitchy bit on Thursday; i honestly feel like if i talk about something private on here rather than in person it’s going to be held against me, which is shitty. So, now i’m talking. Blah.
I’ve lost touch with everything this week. I don’t think i’ve read any of my daily logs except for Re and WockerJabby, i barely ever check my email, and i’m not even on IM 24/7 like i usually am. I thought i was disguising all of this rather well on here with my inane jabber about the weather and how bipolar i am, but apparently you – the astute reader – have managed to glean a bit more information from this than i intended (or, you’ve been snooping on me over at SurvivorBlog2 even though i warned you that i’m a whorey little minx over there). For those of you who haven’t keeping up, let me present the evidence: OhMy!, a spectacle, close-up, sleeping-where?, and the self-referential allusions to things people know nothing about. So… do you know what’s going on yet?
Wow, so, way to stick with that nasty mental place i was in last night. I promise to make an attempt not to get all freaky bi-polar on y’all in the future. Today just rained and kept on raining. I spent one entire class sitting somewhere (other than class, i might add) drinking tea. Today was just relaxing like that. My guitar is being really bitch, so i dunno if Trio will be featured this week (though i do owe you one). Anyhow, i just wanted to drop a note in to say hi seeing as that last bit was rather shitty. Toodles!
Ack, i’m awful, aren’t i. I’ve been pretty shitty towards y’all lately and i haven’t really been explaining myself so much as i’ve been continuously apologizing, and that isn’t especially fair. For those of you who haven’t caught on, i am currently a blogger over at SurvivorBlog2, where i’m revealing all sorts of dirty little details that i’d never say here. So… you can go read it, but i’m not nearly as nice there as i am here so brace yourselves.
Or, maybe the problem is how nice i am here. Yes… that’s right, y’all have pushed me into that awful web-journal corner where too many people i’m afraid to offend have access to this site and i don’t have anything cutting to say anymore. Argh. I’m in a terrible mood. Go read something else. Or don’t. I should probably go to sleep eventually. Thanx for reading.