Gee, don’t you love when blogger won’t publish for a whole day and then you have to backup every post because it eats half of them? Cause… i love that a lot.
by krisis
off-topics
Wow… that’s the most personal thing i’ve ever said on here. I’ve never told that to anyone. Frightening: i’m starting to take the internet seriously.
The funny thing is, i really almost would drop out of school if i found a reasonable alternative. Me… super-involved, happy… the kind of student that would commit hari-kari if my GPA dropped below a 3.5 for longer than a single quarter. I suppose what makes me remarkable (or, remarkable when compared to an average drop-out) is that i feel like a need a reason. In reality, i don’t feel like i’m getting anywhere. I don’t feel as though i’m being taught a single marketable skill, and i don’t know if i’m ever going to learn any. No one has managed to challenge me while keeping it interesting. Not once. Not since Junior Year of highschool. That year in my american history class i had to research a dead person. We had a picnic in a cemetery and we had to chose a tombstone of someone who died previous to 1900, and we had to write an outline of their life: pictures of where they lived, spouse’s name, what they died of, what hospital they were born in. I’ve never had to even contemplate a task as harrowing, and if a professor asked me to do the same thing again tomorrow i’d drop his class in a split second. In the absence of challenge i’ve grown so complacent and afraid of my own mental effort that i’m actually afraid to do anything intelligently. Should Philosophy have really been as hard as i made it out to be? Would it help you if you knew i didn’t read any more than 20 pages of any of the textbooks? What if i told you that i haven’t read more than 20 pages of anything the entire time i’ve spent at Drexel? Yes… i purposely handicapped myself and at last check i had a 3.6 GPA. It’s days like these i wish i made it into an Ivy League school … but my effort is all circular now. I need a challenge to rise to, but i’ll probably shy away from it anyhow.
My personal favourite music critic has just put out his best of 2000 list, and i was pleasantly surprised to find Sarah Harmer on it. I heard bits and pieces of Sarah’s disc You Were Here for the first time on our local folk station last week while at the coffee shop and decided buying it was a risk worth taking. Being the hip boy that i am, i ordered it online and inadvertently had it sent to my house, where it sat shrinkwrapped until today when i braved snow and grey skies to retrieve it. I just got back to the apartment with it, popped it on, loaded the top2000 list, and before the second track even began i was hearing about it from the mouth of my favourite reviewer. (He also endorsed Spoon‘s favourite band, and a tepidly awful Nina Gordon album.) Seeing as i’m still tracking down a few stragglers from 2000 (i also just got Joan Osborne and DeathCab for Cutie), my best-of list will probably be reserved until next month. So, in the meantime, go read the list i’d write if i had 6x the disposable income and 4x the amount of time i have to review cds. And tell him how much you love him.
Remember all my bitching about theatre prior to getting into the play? Well… now i’m not only in the mainstage show, i wound up registering for an acting class yesterday. It would feel like a waste of academic time to me if i had to give up something else to do it, but i hadn’t been able to find any other class for that timeslot. In the end, i’m not really much of an actor. What i am is someone who is willing to get up and try something no matter how dumb it might seem. That one facet of my personality apparently more than makes up for my lack of actual acting, because time and again i’ve been willing to get up in front of an audience to trying something that some other actors weren’t even willing to do. Of course, that leaves me with a lot more in common with Tom Green than the cast of SNL, but i do have an interest (somewhere) to be able to really create a character out of thin air. I can’t do it now… i don’t have character voices or gestures or anything… i tend to just do it with inflection and dramatic pauses. So, maybe i’m ready to head into radio drama. Or, maybe i’m really going to learn something from this class. We’ll see.