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Personal

768779

September 4, 2000 by krisis

wow, Matt Pollard linked back to me again. Either we’ll just keep up the volley, or i’ll eventually get around to adding him to the crushed bar. Go visit him again, and say hi to his friend mel too.

In other proof that my site actually exists, i got linked for no apparent reason other than being a “blogging machine” from Digital
Swirlee
, and also from Not A Pretty Girl (More Ani! I love these people!!). NaPG runs a pretty kickin’ site, and she quoted my favourite entry from last thursday. Go read her entry and everything will make lots of sense.

I wonder if any of these people have listened to Trio? In other news, i refuse to read blogs that underline all of their text. You’ve been warned.

Filed Under: uncategorized

768671

September 4, 2000 by krisis

That picture was taken last halloween. I was Laurel’s submissive at the Drexel Player’s party (i so promise to do the cast page tonite), and my costume consisted of lots of chains and things, vinyl, the ass being cut out of my pleather pants, and leopard print panties. It was a fun party. I have plenty of other racy pictures of me (and of her, for that matter), but i don’t want to portray me as a thin little goth-slut (unless you’re into that kind of thing). Plus, i’ve gotten some much better haircuts since then. Meanwhile, i need to start working on this year’s costume concept….

Filed Under: uncategorized

768552

September 4, 2000 by krisis

This summer’s grueling Orientation Schedule paired with a slightly less carb-infected diet has restored me to a semblance of my old-time build. I’ve even managed to restore my legendary calf muscles through lots and lots of walking. Of course, my left arm is still wimpy due to the broken clavicle and the fact that i still thrash at my guitar right handed (meaning that my right arm is significantly buffer than my left). Now i’ve just gotta get that six-pack going again :)

In case you were wondering, i am a narcissist.


madonna or me?

Filed Under: uncategorized

768462

September 4, 2000 by krisis

Interestingly enough, college cafeteria food cured me of my thinness, to a degree. I basically kept up my picky eating through Senior yea of high school; basically, i had lost my appreciation of food. I eventually got over wanting a turkey sandwhich with lunch or chicken cutlets for dinner, but i had never really picked a favourite meal that i could replace them with. I didn’t enjoy eating anymore. I entered college a very thin boy. And, while i found myself rather attractive in that flat-chested supermodel way, no one else really was interested in me past asking me if i had weight problems.

That changed rather soon, all thanks to cafeteria food. Much in the same way that i can’t resist conquering things that i can easily conquer (a-hem, no need to give examples, eh?), i cannot resist what i percieve to be a free meal. And, having already paid in full for my meal plan, every meal seemed free. I ate eggs or waffles every day for all of my first term, and usually had dinner every night before rehearsal. This didn’t show up on my body during that term (waist-size for tailoring the fall play: 26″), but by the end of a similarly scheduled winter term it had started to. By spring term i had broke my favourite corduroy pants wide open and nearly did the same thing to my favourite pair of vinyl before taking pity on them and giving them to a (female) friend. It turns out i had put on over twenty pounds. 20lbs!!

Of course, it also turned out that all i was eating was carbs and dairy (pasta, pizza, cheese hoagies, waffles, cereal), which meant the weight didn’t actually distribute itself so much as collect in flabby pockets. Well, obviously not flabby (i wasn’t exactly breaking the scale) so much as pudgy, but either way it wasn’t the tone that i sorta used to have. I wasn’t especially pleased, but i liked feeling filled out so i just dealt with it.

Filed Under: uncategorized

September 4, 2000 by krisis

I seem to actually have some vague muscle tone right now, which is trés trés exciting pour moi. I haven’t been buff in any sense of the word since i completed my stint at summer camp before Junior year. You have no idea how much definition you get from wrangling 15 six years olds every day, starting with an hour of swim instruction in the morning.

I haven’t had any muscle tone for quite a while. Towards the end of Junior year of high school i stopped eating red meat, and after a week or two i went totally vegetarian (for the first time since age five). The summer of 1998 was not my healthiest one ever, and i think i was sort of bordering on anorexia without ever being anorexic. I was being very conscious of what i was eating in terms of if it contained any animal and whether it was healthy or not. I sortof got into the mode of only eating when i really felt hungry, which usually isn’t enough for a 16-year old boy. Meanwhile, i have image issues in general which are totally seperate from eating disorders in every way. Combine those two things and you at-worst have a recipe for disaster (a fainting spell) and at best are gonna wind up rather skinny. And i did.

https://crushingkrisis.com/2000/09/768336/

Filed Under: self image

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