Crushing Krisis

Comic Books, Drag Race, & Life in New Zealand

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FaceBook flash mobs crash British bashes

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You might have to read this one to believe it.

The Daily Mail reports that police were called to shut down a local club when more than 500 youths decided to crash a private 18th birthday party that had been advertised on FaceBook.

The hilarity here is that the mob clearly didn’t log in to FaceBook en masse and click “Attending.” An agent of the mob took note of the event, and they colluded in some other way to converge upon it. They must have a special “mob of louts” social network, or perhaps a loutish bulletin board where such anarchy can be planned.

Even more hilarious is that this isn’t an isolated incident, but one in a string of flash mob usurpations of teenaged Brit bashes. Behold the final paragraph:

And in February, thousands of pounds of damage was caused to a house when hordes of louts barged their way in and staged a drug-fuelled orgy at 15-year-old Gemma Johnson’s bash in Worthing, West Sussex.

Except, doing a touch of background research reveals that Ms. Johnson was actually aiming for a drug-fueled orgy, which doesn’t seem to be the case in this new story.

Gemma had an interesting idea, but her execution was off. I think the ultimate in hilarity would be to stage a party that specifically benefits from being crashed, but I’m hard-pressed to think of any kind of event that benefits from the attention of over 500 drunk, drugged, possibly libidinous louts.

Thoughts?

out with the old, out with the new

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Being a consumate overachiever, I am usually all over “small changes that can yield big success” articles. Like, whoo boy, sign me up for micro adjustments that cause macro improvements!

Except, at this point I have made every micro-tweak I can make. I am fully tweaked.

Take, for example. a CNN article from yesterday that suggests five simple diet changes that result in 500+ saved calories a day.

Here’s what they suggested, in comparison to what I do.

Old: whole milk
New: 1 percent milk
Me: rice milk

Old: whole bagel
New: half a bagel
Me: low fat granola
(occasionally a bagel with non-hydrogenated, light spread)

Old: chocolate ice cream
New: chocolate yogurt or a Popsicle
Me: soy- or rice-based ice cream, fruit chillers, or nuts

Old: latte made with whole milk
New: latte made with skim milk
Me: chai made with soy milk

Old: be a couch potato
New: take a 20-minute walk
Me: walk 1-3 miles a day

I could continue to match them one for one – they’d say, “eat lean meat,” and I’d say, “eat fish.” They’d say, “no more extra cheese,” and I’d say, “no more cheese.”

Articles like this make me feel okay for being thin, because I have clearly eliminated every source of culinary indulgence from my life already, and have largely found replacements that I prefer to the original gluttonous versions.

(I wish that articles like this could also make me feel like I can stop worrying that I’m going to turn into a giant Italian balloon when I turn thirty like half of my family did, but I’m just going to have keep being anxious about that bridge until it’s crossed.)

My total tweakedness isn’t limited to diet, which means I react similarly to “small changes” articles about budgets or goal setting – I’m excited to read them until I realize they’re preaching to the me of 2003. I’ve made most of these adjustments already because they all dovetail with my concept of living marginally. I suppose it’s my personal version of being green – why waste money and time on frivolous things you don’t even care about, when you’d rather waste them on frivolous things you actually enjoy?

So, to CNN readers I say, “If you like your lattes with whole milk, go ahead and drink them.” Micro changes are nice, but it’s a major change of attitude that’s going to make the biggest difference in your life.

Psychic Networking

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Facebook is getting a little too effective at advertising to me about things I’ve never even mentioned or even conceived of liking. Witness:

Cordarounds – horizontal corduroy pants, lined with hot, dorky paisley. If Elise, Lindsay, and Gina were released into a department store containing these pants I believe that they would each independently buy me a pair.

So, um, girls, go to that store and do your thing, because these are $90 a pair.

Rolling Razor – a double-headed, contoured razor. I hate shaving, mostly because I feel like disposable razors are the most impractical means of accomplishing the task. This is much to Elise’s dismay, as she isn’t a fan of stubbly kisses.

When I saw this ad I immediately marched into Elise’s office to show her, like, “See, if I had this I would shave just to kiss you.” (Also, the “evolution” part of the site is awesome.)

Modern Tonic – a slightly gay take on pop culture. They don’t actually say that on their ultra-slick’n’simple site, but I swear that’s what the Fbook ad says. And, hi, could there be a website more geared towards me?

Get out of my head, Facebook.

(But, actually, don’t.)

One Hang Drum Per Child (complements of Dante Bucci)

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The new promo video for One Laptop Per Child features my friend and sometimes percussionist Dante Bucci‘s original composition for hang drum:

Earlier today I briefly quizzed Dante on how this came to be, and he said:

The firm they hired to do the animation somehow came across my YouTube video and they wanted to use the song. It happened to be one of the songs I recorded but didn’t make it to the EP, so i had a good quality recording for them to use.

The hang drum (pronounced “hung”) is a ufo-shaped, hollow percussion instrument that’s not unlike an inverted steel drum. Each hang has a root note in the center and a scale surrounding it, as marked by tiny divets around the circumference of the instrument. Each year a limited number of hangs are made, in specific keys and scales.

At this point Dante is one of the international experts on the Hang. He’s taken the instrument to places other people hadn’t previously conceived – playing multiple drums at once, and tracking the hang against drums and bass on his new EP.

This tune – “Fanfare” – is my current favorite.

You can catch a set on the hang from Dante most Wednesdays (though not tomorrow) at Lyndzapalooza’s open mic at Intermezzo Bar & Café @ 3131 Walnut Street. You can also hear him playing percussion and singing background vocals at Mutlu’s shows in the Philly area.

Stuff I have bookmarked, but never investigated.

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I’ve been futilely struggling to clean my office/studio so that Gina and I can record our next Live @ Rehearsal disc (and also so I can make good on promises to Vicky and Nate to record them).

I realized the futility of my struggle was connected not to the level of mess or lack of places to put things. Instead, it is due to my obsessive need to collect tiny flecks of information that I might at some point have a future use for.

This collection takes the shape of back issues of Wired with folded over pages, old business cards with words scribbled on their backs, and old notepads with a few last clinging pages. Occasionally, an url makes it all the way into my bookmarks file – making it even less likely that I’ll ever visit it.

I am throwing them all out.

Below is the net results of my trash haul – the bits of information that seem worth remembering.

If you know anything about any of them please feel free to chime in, as clearly I still haven’t gotten around to looking into them too deeply.

37signals (Small business software.)

Dymo DiscPainter (Only $279 – could be worth it.)

The Motels. (Will I like them?)

The Annotated Watchmen. (I finally sat down and read it last weekend, so maybe now I’ll have a use for this one.)

Boost Your Bottom Line (butt exercises)

City Chase (Amazing Race without a television; Elise and I both bookmarked it to show each other, but haven’t got much farther than that)

Sheepskin Sandals (I think I wanted to buy these for Jack?)

The Pirate Bay (I don’t actually like torrents; I must have been looking for something specific.)

Birth of Rocker Venus (I use this a lot on mix CDs; not sure why it’s still bookmarked.)

BitPim (Allows you to manipulate data on your cellphone.)

The Rainy River Record (I have no idea.)

Entertainer’s Secret Throat Spray (I’m happy with my Vocal Eze, even if it’s just a placebo effect.)

Lark’s Tenor Guitar (Still tempting, but I wouldn’t spend more than $300)

Electronic Frontier Foundation Staff (Elise and I loved Fred Von Lohmann in a documentary – maybe This Film Is Not Yet Rated? If I ever went to law school this is what I’d want to do.)

Tune Tech Clip-On Tuner (Gina has this one; I still prefer my Intellitouch.)

How to convert a DVD for iPod (I’ll need a bigger PC and iPod to make this useful. Maybe next year.)

Better Living Through Design (Ikea for rich people.)

How to use space in a presentation (Just now cribbed from MLarson; if I remember this exists I will use it dozens of times a year)

Ma.tt (Love this design; fodder for the pm.com redesign.)

There might be more…