Crushing Krisis

Comic Books, Drag Race, & Life in New Zealand

Creative

Held My Tongue (2009 Demos) – 3/30

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This is post 3 of 30 featuring live, single-take demos of each of the 30 songs I’m considering for my upcoming studio album. Each potential album tune is accompanied by a B-Side, to make each post a virtual 45 single (remember those?).

I don’t have too much voice after my night of covering over an hour of open mic time, so tomorrow’s foray should be pretty entertaining. But, first, tonight’s.

Song #208: Real You (live demo)
Never previously recorded

In spring of 2007 I got the idea that I was going to write a song about each person I knew, but when this one came out first I realized it might not be such a great idea.

Song #182: Let It Be (live demo)
Never previously recorded

I wrote this perfectly serviceable, sweet song in May 2004 – two weeks before writing “A Little Bit.” Considering that I wound up quoting that song in my wedding vows, it isn’t entirely surprising that this one fell by the wayside. I’m happy to finally hear it.

If you dig one (or both) of these songs, please leave a comment – your feedback will have a big effect on the songs I ultimately choose for the album.

Held My Tongue (2009 Demos) – 2/30

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This is post 2 of 30 featuring live, single-take demos of each of the 30 songs I’m considering for my upcoming studio album. Each potential album tune is accompanied by a B-Side, to make each post a virtual 45 single (remember those?).

If we’re all lucky my mixing skills will begin to audibly improve at some point in the series :)

Song #218: Gone Baby Gone (live demo)
Never previously recorded

Started in March of 2008 – the synthesis of a night watching Darjeeling Limited and Gone Baby Gone back to back, perhaps with the song from Once spinning in the rear of my brain. It took forever to finish; the bridge came last (and in two different keys).

Song #8: Afterglow (live demo)
Last recorded in early 2002

Written on January 6, 1998 about a girl I dreamt with blue hair who turned out to be real. Legendarily, when I brought this to Lit Mag they told me, “I think you’ve stopped writing poems and started writing songs.” Again, note my early disregard of key signatures.

If you dig one (or both) of these songs, please leave a comment – your feedback will have a big effect on the songs I ultimately choose for the album.

Held My Tongue (2009 Demos) – 1/30

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This is post 1 of 30 featuring live, single-take demos of each of the 30 songs I’m considering for my upcoming studio album. Each potential album tune is accompanied by a B-Side, to make each post a virtual 45 single (remember those?).

Song #222: Small & Lonely (live demo)
Never previously recorded

I wrote “Small & Lonely” in May and June of 2008, largely while in-transit in Philly. Elise helped me with the melody of the chorus one day on the Broad Street Line.

Song #20: Sweet Nothing (live demo)
Last recorded sometime in 1999

I wrote “Sweet Nothing” in spring of 1998, in my childhood home. It’s heavily influenced by PJ Harvey’s “Ecstasy.” Note that in my youth I didn’t care so much about what key I was in.

If you dig one (or both) of these songs, please leave a comment – your feedback will have a big effect on the songs I ultimately choose for the album.

New demos for a new album(!)

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Sometime before autumn arrives I will begin to record my first full-length, multi-tracked, studio album since 2001’s Relief.

Wow. I knew that was true, but it’s pretty monumental to see it in print.

In 2001 I had 117 songs to choose from and two weeks of studio time to record and mix in Drexel’s tiny, single-room, analog recording studio. (They’ve vastly improved their resources since then.)

In 2009 I have 241 songs to choose from and an unlimited amount of studio time to record and mix in my own tiny, single-room, digital recording studio. (I’ve also vastly improved my resources since then.)

Of my 241 songs, 30 of them are in fierce competition for 13ish spots on the album. There’s also the other 211 songs, many of which are long overdue a fresh recording even though I’m not considering them for the album (and, maybe I would consider them if I had a fresh recording to listen to).

So, I’m planning to record live, single-take demos for each of my 30 top picks for the album, accompanying each one with a B-side from the other 211 songs. I’m sure I’ll toss a few covers in as well.

If I record a demo every day this month I’ll be ready to record my album by July! And, although that sounds implausible to me (and you) at the moment, CK reminds me that on three separate occasions I recorded 24 songs in less than a single week, and once I actually recorded 30 songs in a single month.

No matter how long it takes, it’ll be a chance for me (and you) to hear 60 of my songs in crisp, multi-tracked audio – and that should be enough new stuff to hold us over through however interminably long it takes me to record an actual album in my present state of dotage.

don’t fail me now

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The last forty-eight hours of my life.

At six o’clock on Monday I am playing guitar. I have been playing for hours, drilling songs against a metronome. The bridge of “Unengaged” for twenty minutes straight. I’ve worn through a callous for the first time in ages.

Later I rehearse piano and vocals equally as hard. I fall asleep reading Outliers in bed, which just two chapters in already has caused one blowup with E because I said if I had me as a child I’d call me a failure.

I don’t want to be a failure.

Tuesday I have a fun, frantic day at work – the kind where you realize at the end of the day that you never stopped to hang your coat. I start writing the second my ass is on the bus, and emerge almost three hours later with that last post.

I rehearse. Hard. Again. Trying not to fail. Despite my voice sounding brittle and inflexible due to the lack of a warm-up, I venture out to an open mic while E stays at home and works on freelance.

At the restaurant my first song is awesome; the room is quietly transfixed. (I’m not a failure?) Afterward I promptly break a string and become shy and faltering when I’m handed another guitar. I fuck up “Like a Virgin,” of all things, and promptly lose everyone’s attention.

Today I feel slightly beaten up (thank god I don’t drink at those things), on top of beating myself up. Still manage another frantic work day that barely includes a coat-hanging. On the way home I listen to my own voice on my iPod, which a lot of days is the only thing I can manage to do.

I’m listening to “Like a Virgin” from 2006 and thinking, This is awful. Why am i singing like that? (Of course, I wouldn’t make it ten seconds into “Like a Virgin” from 2001.)

Then I listen to a Trio from 2008 and realize, God, I really did get better.

I am not a failure.

I get home and am kissed goodbye as E heads out to front her band at the Khyber. Another hour of writing.