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I am literally worrying myself sick.

I just got off the phone with my mother, and it seems that no matter how things turn out i’ll being going home tonight with all of my stuff in tow? Why? Because, as previously mentioned, i am essentially being screwed by everyone in the moving process except for my mother. Matt has disappeared for the day, and i hope he’s alright, but if he is then he has abit of explaining to do (in my opinion). The only thing i appear to have done wrong is take too much responsibilty on myself, which in turn didn’t force me to coordinate everything closely with Matt. So, when i assumed a plan was in motion (and it was on my end), it really wasn’t.

Meanwhile, i can’t decide whether the realitor “waiting until the check is cleared” is a good thing or a bad thing. If the guy isn’t giving me a load of BS, then it’s a good thing, since he does good business. Otherwise, he’s a lazy bum and he’s jerking me around.

No matter who is at fault for what, what it all comes down to is me, running a temperature, trying not to swallow, with hours of packing that would have been done tomorrow, and no lease even though it was meant to start today.

teeheehee – Crack Aficionado Online

lalala. I enjoy getting fucked over by everyone, really. Actually, i don’t, and starting right about now i am done being nice to people. Period.

I think part of my niceness stems from my continual fear that i am doing something that could draw equal or worse criticism from someone. This has been the case in class, at home, at work, and this summer. As a result of it i have been sucked into doing things i don’t want to do, enduring situations i have been uncomfortable in, and being rather miserable in general.

Today the situation is this: Matt has disappeared off of the face of the earth, and we were supposed to go and sign our lease today. I am annoyed enough at this, but to compound the situation, a call to the realitor revealed that he didn’t even draw up our lease yet because my mother’s check “hadn’t cleared.” Obviously the fucker wanted cash. Meanwhile, the realitor runs his operation along with his brother, and neither of them ever offer up their names when you meet them or talk with them on the phone. Voicing my confusion about who i was dealing with by asking if they were twins, i was met with “no, we’re robots,” and was hung up on.

So, now i am sitting here, out $500 with no lease to show for it, roommate nowhere to be found, sick, and very very angry. I’m not sure what can be done to alleviate anything going on in this situation, but barring some act of god in the next two hours, i’ll be moving home tonight to avoid being evicted from the dormitory on Sunday by force (whether it be physical or monetary). I (with the occasional aid of my dear mother) have done just about everything i can have possibly done in this situation, with my only failure being that i woke up late the day after the Weezer concert. However, i seem to be getting nothing but FUCKED in return.

wow … i just heard this tremendous crash and thought that the new dorm had crumbled under its own blocky weight, but a glance out my window reveals otherwise. It seems Philly is being treated to another humidity triggered downpour (that will surely clear up in under an hour). This ultra-soggy weather has been on and off for the past few weeks, and i am definitely enjoying all the rain. However, these mid-day explosions of sound and water can be a little unsettling. Especially when caught out without an umbrella.