Crushing Krisis

Comic Books, Drag Race, & Life in New Zealand

thoughts

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Yet another six albums i should have owned years ago were added to my collection today: The Velvet Underground Boxed Set (used in perfect condition for $20, how cool is that?) and Portishead Live at the Roseland, NYC. Portishead is the sort of band i could never get into despite being exposed to them for years, but suddenly they make sense to me. To hear them perform their songs live with a full band, dj, and orchestration is totally mind-numbing. Definitely one of the coolest live ensembles i’ve heard in a long time.

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/01/2058467/

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How do find the right frame of mind for a relationship? I mean… being wholly unexperienced, i wonder these idiot sorts of things. Did you always assume you’d grow old with every person you ever dated seriously, or did you just assume they’d last for a month or two and then fade away. Were you ever pleasantly surprised either way? is the trick just to expect nothing and enjoy what you have? Well, yes, of course it is, but i need a framework in which to look at things, and i don’t know if i can deal with “You’ll be that person who i dated for a year in college and still send postcards to.” I mean, if you admit it will end, why bother starting … except so that you can have the experience. Yeah, i suddenly know how to answer all my own idiot questions, see how much more interesting i am now?

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/01/2058355/

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So, i think last week’s archive might all might sense to you now that i’ve given you a frame of reference to view it within. I obviously was spending less time in the apartment than per usual, and i was being unusually cryptic about it because so many people i know in real life read this log. That’s why i posted that one really bitchy bit on Thursday; i honestly feel like if i talk about something private on here rather than in person it’s going to be held against me, which is shitty. So, now i’m talking. Blah.

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/01/2056539/

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It’s interesting how weather (and it’s colour) can affect people. All of today was grey and damp, and even my cheeriest friends were slightly subdued from their normal states. Normally frenetic people got downgraded to frantic, and the cheery and smiley became the sarcastic and bleak. In fact, most of the coolest people i know reported the same sort of emotionally violent mood i was experiencing last night. Is the weather sucking our lives away? Are we all too empathetic and responding to each other? Or is the gray in the sky just an excuse to match ourselves to it? When the ground was covered with vivid white snow we were all brisk and crisp and light. No wonder love is always in the air in the Spring…

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/01/2040887/