thoughts

As with any big event in CK-land, the Blame-a-Thon required some recovery.

I can get into the whys and wherefores of the recovery some other time. In short, I stayed up for something to the tune of 32 hours, we raised tons of money for LiveStrong, and by the end of the night I was a meandering, sobbing wreck of good intentions.

The following week I saw partner-in-musical-crimes Gina perform in the Fringe Fest show Fefu and Her Friends, and it was wonderful. Even though I have forsaken acting for music, Gina will always be an actress, and it was inspiring to see her in her element with a cast of other outstanding actresses. (and, those aren’t the idle words of a fan – even the local paper highlighted the strong acting in the show).

In the meantime, Elise’s band Filmstar has gotten good. Really good. Like, each new song is a pretty solid single. And, as of last night, they were voted The Deli Magazine’s band of the month for October.

Pretty wild.

Behind the scenes of all that awesome, though, there is a slightly different story. I’m getting a little frustrated with all of these team successes I’ve been a part of. Yes, the teams are cool, the successes have been memorable. But, I need to find some of my own success. I have this nine year old blog, and I’m the only guy on the team. I have my own 250 songs, and I’m the only guy on that team too.

My birthday passed by with little event this week. Twenty-eighth. I managed to make it through 27, to die without dying, and here I am on the other side.

I think it will be an interesting year.

For all 24 hours of today my life will be streaming live @ www.livestream.com/blameathon. If you miss it live, some of the best bits are available as on-demand archives.

I am approaching peak stress.

Like, peak stress ever. More than wedding stress. Catching myself pulling at my hair with my fists in meetings stress.

And I’m really happy. Like, deliriously.

#blamedrewscancer planning insanity is in overdrive heading into Wednesday’s 9/9/09 Blame-a-Thon benefit concert (right now working to curate our overnight film festival)(which did not exist two days ago). At work I’m on a few unusual extra-curricular projects, like a benefit concert (oh hai, another one!). I’m writing new songs and recording lots of videos. I think I’ve cried at least once every day this week. And, I seem to have largely given up on qualitative time spent sleeping, eating, or seeing my wife.

All of that should result in grumpiness. But it’s not. For the first time in a long while I feel totally myself – like residual self image me has busted out of my head, Athena-style, and is now wandering the streets with giant curly hair and an even bigger voice, laughing uproariously.

Maybe it’s the weather? Philadelphia is suddenly all cool and Autumnal, a weeks-early birthday gift. Sleeping with the window open, wearing layers. It’s my season, I’m doing things I love, and I have my beautiful curly hair back. I even like how I look in full human motion on tonight’s webcast.

Seriously, I think Elise is drugging my soy milk.