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Grading The Voice – Team Cee Lo

May 9, 2011 by krisis

After Blake and Christina on the row of The Voice mentors we arrive at Goodie Mob member, half of Gnarls Barkley, and unstoppable songwriting force Cee Lo Green.

For me, Cee Lo Green is the most legitimate pick as both a capital-V Voice and mentor on this show. He’s a singer, but he’s also an artist, musician, and songwriter. He’s current, but he’s also been around for over 15 years. He’s mainstream, but he’s also a freaking weirdo. As Blake said, he might come out dressed as Batman. Or a Peacock.

And I would love it.

Cee Lo went all-in for pretty girls and intriguing voices, and the resulting team is pretty intriguing team. On the flip, his competition with Adam and lusting after ladies started to wear thin after only two episodes, and he battled Ms. Aguilera for the incoherency title (which is a pretty remarkable feat, as both of them could critique a circle around Randy Randy Randy).

Will Cee Lo’s solid gold instincts translate to reliable mentorship, or will he be all peacock feathers and obscure cover songs? It’s a pity he has to battle his team down to half, because they’re packed with potential.

Let’s take a peek at what Cee Lo has in store for us.

Team Cee Lo

    1. Kelsey Rey – “American Boy”
      Was I influenced by being able to see her? It doesn’t matter. Her precision handling of the jazzy melody of the song was incredible. She made sure all of the rapid fire interval leaps were distinct. She does not need to be a belter (or a beauty) with that voice (and, as Cee Lo pointed out, great breath control!). Christina was right on with her “the kind of voice for radio” comment. It wasn’t the backhanded “we need to auto-tune you or bury you in reverb” that the comment usually means on Idol. More like, “wow, we can put you on anything and push your voice to the forefront.” Her reedy tone makes me want to hear some Michael Jackson out of her immediately. I would have rung in for her and fought hard.Did she make the right pick with Cee Lo? I say Adam would have been better for her (Her fronting his band? Hot.), but he didn’t make a very strong case. Christina was genuine, but I can see Kelsey wanting to steer clear of being turned into a screamer. See, Cee Lo it is.(Fun facts about Kelsey Rey: She was a member of a tween group called “Funn Club.” She used to be blonde. She made it all the way to the top 50 of Idol but lost her voice before her final audition. The less said about the awful club track on her homepage, the better.)
      .
    2. Vicci Martinez – “Rolling in the Deep”
      Here is a Voice. Was “Rolling” the right song to show off her beautiful, husky vibrato and rock belting? I remain unsure. She did amazing things with it, and with that sort of unusual voice she’s probably spent her recent life getting lumped into the Duffy/Adele bucket. In reality, she’s a lot more unique than that, and one of the few truly remarkable people that has been featured. Christina should have fought Cee Lo harder for her, but I passed … she needs careful direction, and she might not connect with audiences in the voting rounds. She’ll need the help of both Cee Lo and the show’s editors to make it to the final four.(Vicci has had a prolific indie career. Check out her website to hook up with her existing social media identity, or download one of her six existing albums on Bandcamp.)
      .

[Read more…] about Grading The Voice – Team Cee Lo

Filed Under: critique, reviews, teevee Tagged With: Ranking, The Voice

Grading The Voice – Team Christina

May 9, 2011 by krisis

We move from Blake down the row of The Voice mentors to Christina Aguilera.

Of the panel, hers is clearly the voice that most deserves the capital T and V. She may pick some dull songs from time to time, or oversing good ones, but there’s no denying the power of her instrument.

As I watched Christina’s cartoonish “I’m thinking really hard” face in her turned chair I felt like I got a vibe for her strategy. This is someone who knows the characteristics of a good voice. You could visibly see her turn off to someone if they hit a bum note, or even if they were in-tune but out-of-key during a run.

I think X-Tina was on the hunt for two belters (one black, one white), one unusual pop voice, and one guy. Aside from losing out on quality men, she got just what she wanted. Once she had a favorite in the bag, she was looking for someone for them to battle – either to push them harder, or to make her choice simpler.

The minor problem with her picks is the minor problem with her. Note when she tapped in – usually on the basis of melisma and ornamental high notes. If an auditioner didn’t have that – or Adam gunning for them – then X-Tina’s interest wasn’t piqued. My evidence? She wound up with a seven-lady team with only one truly off-kilter pick (who, surprise, has a Linda Perry vibe).

Is her strategy all that bad? Nope. For all her wishy-washy arguments to join her team, I think once it gets down to singing in a room with them she’s going to be a hard-ass. But can a vocal prodigy like Christina articulate good vocal technique to relative novices?

Let’s take a look at her roster.

Team Christina

    1. Julia Eason – “Mercy”
      Julia is my dark horse pick of the competition at the moment. She has a beautiful voice for pop and good instincts on how to use it. Christina was right, her runs were thoughtful and distinct. That said, she pushed a little too hard on the verse runs in her chest voice, which threatened to throw her out of tune. Quick runs like that take finesse, which she clearly showed on the intensely pretty higher run in mixed voice (where she physically couldn’t hit it so hard). I’d chalk it up to nerves. Even as she wobbled at points her vocal was connected, and only shouty on the highest chest note. I would have taken her in a heartbeat, and I think she’s the person Christina seemed the most genuinely excited to work with.(Not a shock that Julia’s already experienced in music – as Julia Harriman. She has a YouTube  channel as Julia Harriman with two finely-produced songs – one country, and one alt-pop. )
      .
    2. Tarralyn Ramsey – “Breathe”
      Did she luck out by being first, or is she the real deal? I say the latter. Despite two bad lines of nerves and some struggling in the top of her chest range, she has one of the most impressive voices of all the women in the show. Take note of all of the unforced head voice, in which she hits only one bad note. That’s not an easy thing to manage. I don’t think anyone else showed this sort of balladeer pipes, save for Javier and maybe Angela Wolff – both on Team Levine – and neither had Tarralyn’s range. I fear for her nerves and her handling of faster pop songs, but I would have recruited her in a hot second.(Another established artist, Tarralyn was signed to Verity/Warner and released a pair of self-titled Gospel/R&B albums. She’s also no stranger to reality TV singing competitions – she won VH1’s Born to Diva in 2004.)
      .
    3. Frenchie Davis – “I Kissed a Girl”
      On one hand, that early in the competition I would have jumped on a powerful pop belter pretty quickly. Christina rightfully has some doubts about Tarralyn, so she by punching in on Frenchie she was stacking the deck in her favor (and in her wheelhouse). At points Frenchie pushed too hard, and it was interfering with her support and breath control. She also was a hair behind the beat, but maybe that’s how Perry performs it. (I don’t want to know; Perry is the death of Feminism. It’s another post entirely.) The combination didn’t inspire much blind confidence in me, which may be why Adam and Blake didn’t go for her. I would have eventually punched in to block X-Tina from snagging her, realized instantly (like Cee Lo) who she was, and then fought X-Tina for her. (Except, in this alternate universe I’d already have Tarralyn, who I am confident in, so I’d pass.) Will her years of pop and Broadway experience help or hinder Christina’s efforts to coach her?
      .

[Read more…] about Grading The Voice – Team Christina

Filed Under: critique, reviews, teevee Tagged With: Ranking, The Voice

Grading The Voice – Team Blake

May 8, 2011 by krisis

I’ll admit it: I haven’t the slightest idea who The Voice mentor Blake Shelton is. I’ve never before seen his name or heard his voice, despite him being around for a decade.

Considering that my voracious taste in music runs wider than a typical Top 40 listener, I think Blake had a major handicap when it comes to team-picking on The Voice. Most contestants who aren’t country singers probably didn’t know who he was. Note that he only won over one non-country singer who had multiple choices.

Blake’s strategy was to go all-in for someone that moved him from note one, or to come in as a late speculator on people other judges had already turned for. I don’t know if it was an effective strategy – combined with his low name recognition he lost on a couple of people that he would have worked well with.

The resulting octet of singers is the weakest starting lineup, but Blake still has a chance. Why? As a country artist, he comes from a different background than his colleagues. I think he was acting less like a fan or a speculator, and more like an old-school A&R guy. He wants voices he can mold and improve, not sure singers who need a little tweaking.

I might not have picked his team, but I won’t be surprised if he finds success with some unlikely suspects.

How does Team Blake rank?

Team Blake

    1. Patrick Johnson – “Live Like You’re Dying”
      I don’t know if I would have picked him blindly – certainly not as early as Adam and Cee Lo did! But, once they were in I would have gone for it too. Patrick did nothing wrong other than never really shift registers, and that’s the fault of a boring song. He’s got a fine, resonant baritone voice and he’s an incredibly handsome dude. If he makes it through to the voting rounds he’s gonna clean up on genre, good looks, and reliability. In his place, I would have picked Cee Lo’s genuine enthusiasm over Blake’s “mumble mumble country.”
      .
    2. Dia Frampton – “Bubbly”

      Dia Frampton fronted a major label band with her sister Meg. Here, Here and Here was their one album on the label.

      Dia proved that The Voice can be subtle instead of screaming. I honestly loved her restrained take on “Bubbly.” It was a strong choice thanks to its distinctive melodic jumps. I would have went in on it around when Cee Lo did – at the delicate, high “yeah” before the second chorus. I don’t forsee people voting for her, though. Blake must cultivate a monster competitor in this laid back storybook author for her to survive in the competition.(Remember how the show said some singers were “invited”? Guess what? Dia fronted a pretty solid pop/rock band signed to Warner Bros. with her sister. The Eisley-esque band, Meg & Dia, released Here, Here and Here on the label and were dropped last year. Maybe they should have thought up a better name? They self-released a new LP, Cocoon, just a month ago. So much for her being too shy.)
      .

[Read more…] about Grading The Voice – Team Blake

Filed Under: critique, reviews, teevee Tagged With: Ranking, The Voice

Remember when?

May 2, 2011 by krisis

I remember convincing my mother to let me stay home from school to watch news coverage of the fall of the Berlin Wall.

I remember my grade school wheeling a television into our chapel, begrudgingly, to watch Clinton’s inauguration.

I remember Chestnut Street streaming with people, adults and students, on September 11.

I’m not sure what I’m supposed to remember about last night, or why.

Life is binary. Someone terrifying and monstrous was alive. His ideals and goals were completely opposed to ours. Now he is dead. There is little to digest or debate.

Life is binary. Liberty is digital. Progressive. Freedom is not an on-or-off state. After slaves were freed they still lacked many liberties. Women won the right to vote but were still treated as second-class citizens. Gays and lesbians will soon be free to serve openly in our military, but not to enjoy the status of marriage.

Life is binary. Liberty is digital. The pursuit of happiness is infinite. It is endless possibility that your life and liberty help to define. It’s who you are and what you do, and how satisfied you are about doing it.

What will I remember about last night? That it concluded four days of celebration around the marriage of two of my favorite people. That the bride’s family traveled from across the country and globe to be here. People I had heard about in stories, whose sickness and health had stuck in my thoughts. All of us in the ballroom as I endeavored to steal the bride’s shoe from her foot (a tradition). Sitting in a hotel bar watching her pose with Colonial War reenactors, a perfect juxtaposition of the men who fought to secure our unalieable rights and someone who came a long way (in distance and life) to be able to enjoy them.

I will remember Elise and I, lying in bed in our own house with my laptop on my chest, exhausted from celebrating for days. Watching reaction blossom from one Facebook status to a dozen to my entire Twitter feed. Watching President Obama speak.

I woke up this morning in the same bed, next to the same person, free and content.

If anyone ever asks me what I was doing when I found out that Osama Bin Laden was dead, I will tell them it had nothing to do with death, and everything to do with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Filed Under: memories, news, thoughts

Joining the Boys’ Club

April 12, 2011 by krisis

I have never been “one of the guys.”

Except for live-nearly-nude-dancing-girls, apparently.

I don’t do a lot of typical dude things, like ogle women or watch sports. Most of my friends are women. Even in my dim memories of kindergarten, I surrounded myself with girls.

That’s not to say I don’t have any close male friends. We just don’t do dude stuff together, like … uh, I’m out gender stereotypes already. This is how little I am connected to my dudeness.

That said, I have found myself in the groom’s party of one of my longtime male BFFs and – unlike my wedding party – this one is a single sex affair. A fest of sausage, if you will. Which means not only am I in for some guy-on-guy quality time, but I was in for a bachelor party.

Prepared as I might be to drink other men under the table while watching sports (seriously, just try me), inherent in the looming bachelor party was a looming visit to a strip club.

I dreaded the concept. The only time I was nearly convinced to attend a strip club with friends I wound up having dry heaves before I could even get in a cab. I’m too little of a stereotypical dude and too much of a feminist. Paying to objectify strange, naked women is really low on my list of things that sound fun.

(To wit: my own bachelor party was a co-ed 80s prom entitled “Like a Virgin.”)

I can't deny it - I honestly did resemble him a bit on Friday. You know, with the unbearable hotness of me.

Yet, at a strip club is where I found myself on Friday night. Well, they had tops and bottoms on, so I guess it wasn’t a strip club. A pole dancing joint? Is that more accurate?

Hilariously, I turned out to be a live-nearly-nude-dancer magnet. E thinks it’s because I looked like Bradley Cooper in the episide of Alias where he pretends to be an Australian rock star.

She was probably right.

And, folks, point numero uno everyone failed to tell me about strip clubs? You might have to be careful how you touch the women, but they do not have any hesitations about how they touch you.

Yeah.

You know, I can’t not be polite and chat for a minute if someone is nuzzling me with her breasts, and then I feel bad for taking up her time, and then I am obligated to fold dollar bills and slip them into improbably small straps holding together even more improbably small garments.

The whole thing is ooky and disgusting slippery slope (not unlike a stripper pole … HEY-OH!)

After the first hour I was tipsy and having fun with the guys and alternatingly glowering at my cell phone in an attempt to ward off further elbow-molesting bosoms, having driven off the last woman by going on at great length about how my beautiful wife helps me select all of my fashion after she complimented my scarf.

I can't even contemplate the coordination it would take for me to be able to do this. I'm still working on mastering tree pose.

I felt another pair of breasts at my elbow (seriously, my elbow = SO POPULAR), and turned for my casual brushoff. This woman’s opening gambit was to ask me what I did for a living. When I said, “communications – marketing, really,” she exclaimed, “That’s my major! Well, really I’m journalism.” Which, as we know, I was too.

That’s when I started to have a little fun at the strip club. At first it was a room full of strange women, none of whom where even vaguely as attractive as my wife. As aerobic as their gyrations were, it didn’t feel much different than watching a class at a gym.

Then I actually took the time to meet one of the women – a perfectly sweet Italian girl – and give her advice on how database classes are going to help her if she ever has to do any direct marketing. And then I met another woman who was a fitness instructor and collected comic books.

You know what, I didn’t mind watching them dance. They were real people with great legs. And we kept chatting after they danced.

(Of course, there was still the inherent weirdness of having to tip a girl to have the sort of conversation I’d have at a networking night at a bar…)

Does this story have a moral?

I am one of the guys, even if I’m not a stereotypical guy. I can drink and carouse and have fun without being a chauvinist, so I need to get over my fear of “The Boys Club.”

Also, I was reminded of something important: attraction is context. My wife is more attractive than any stripper not only because she is smokin’ hot, but because she’s my mega-talented best friend. Similarly, I think my friends’ wives and girlfriends are beautiful. Why? I know them. They are not random pretty faces on the street – they are dynamic people with a myriad of skills and interests.

So are the women in a strip club – but you don’t really get the chance to hear about that (unless you keep tipping them). I guess most men are fine with that, but my not being fine with it doesn’t mean I am not a man, guy, dude, or boy.

Next up? I hear it’s traditional for us to kidnap the bride at the wedding and barter in liquor with the groom for her return.

That, I think I can handle.

Filed Under: self image, sex, stories, thoughts, Year 11

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