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self-aware

March 29, 2001 by krisis

Blagh. Somehow i got sucked into filing. See, my job is to generally fill in as Admissions Counciler whenever the actual councilers need assistance, and so far i’ve really done everything other than accept/deny incoming students. But, today half of the filing wall was pulled down as we sent out acceptance/denial letters, and now they’ve all got to get filed back up. So, polite and accomadating person that i am, i offered to file.

When i was little i used to dump out my box of G.I. Joe filecards on the floor and realphabetize them just for fun. But, it isn’t the same when the files are big and heavy and have dozens of razor-like little papers inside of them (as opposed to the blunt-cut edges of the cardboard cards on my floor). And, to top it off, the filing staff doesn’t seem to like me that much – barely mustering up enough enough niceness for me one i was actually helping them out.

Blagh. Anyhow, i just exercised my power to make important decisions, and decided i’m way too busy to file. No more filing for me.

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/03/2988192/

Filed Under: admissions, ocd

March 26, 2001 by krisis

I had just written a huge post about how i hate to use public restrooms, but it was actually quite weird and i had no idea that the Escape button wiped out the blogger posting box. Wow… blogger is really riddled with ways to lose a post, isn’t it? God knows i seem to have found most of them…

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/03/2947388/

Filed Under: Blogger, ocd

March 23, 2001 by krisis

The coolest part of finishing a Demo each spring? Getting to write new liner notes once a year! As i walked home from the studio tonight i was already mentally listing all of the people i’d be thanking, and i just jotted down a rough draft. So, maybe i’m getting a little ahead of myself, but it’s like writing an acceptance speech for the Oscars when you’re the underdog: you probably won’t win, but it feels good just knowing you’ve taken the time to single out all the people that mattered to your work.

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/03/2910631/

Filed Under: ocd, relief

March 23, 2001 by krisis

So, i took the day off from blogging yesterday to do nothing. Sure, i went to work and all that, but otherwise it was wholly uneventful. I wound up sitting on my ass watching NBC reruns and eating salsa all night. Very productive.


It’s just that after spending so much time busy with friends nearly every day, a night to myself becomes entirely meaningless, even though it’s what i thought i really wanted. Sometimes i start losing touch with my “identity” when i’m flitting from person to person and from place to place, but then i get back here and realize that i haven’t got the slightest clue at what was missing. So, maybe i’m just possessive of my free time and want to make sure that i totally waste some of it on my own, or maybe i really do need time along here and there to recenter. Who knows…. anyhow, it’s off to work with me.

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/03/2902550/

Filed Under: identity, introversion, isolation, thoughts

March 19, 2001 by krisis

Damn, that post took about as long to get right as “Under My Skin” did today. Obviously my brain is fried… or perhaps we tripped my “perfectionist” switch at some point today. If that’s the case, someone really ought to turn it off. (postscript: Of course, in classic fashion, none of the changes i made to the post are there anymore, and i’m not making them all over again. So much for that perfectionist theory…)

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/03/2851180/

Filed Under: bloggish, ocd, relief, thoughts, under my skin

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