Crushing Krisis

Comic Books, Drag Race, & Life in New Zealand

krisis

Krisis has been creating Crushing Krisis since 2000, writing songs since 1996, and reading comics since 1991. He is a Customer Success and Digital Brand Strategy executive, serial organizer, parent, and feminist, among other things. Based in Philly through 2017, he now resides in Wellington, NZ.

by

So, wow, i got a huge response both in visitors and in posts from SurvivorBlog about my final words. Ian of the peanut gallery even got all huffy and called me an irritating prick! Don’t you love pushing people’s buttons? Maybe he’ll actually be around a little more often now; i think that’s the most i’ve ever seen him post in a single day as it is. To counteract his comment, MJ says she misses me already. However, none of the sBloggers expressed much remorse other than Alayna, who invited me to come and visit her in New York (an invitation that my girlfriend is less than thrilled about, i’m sure).

I honestly feel somewhat shitty about writing my last words in such a spiteful fashion; it wasn’t that i was angry, i just felt like saying everything i had neglected to say so far. Maybe i burned a bridge or two, but i at least sparked some conversation in the sBlog itself and in the Peanut Gallery, and god knows they need something to talk about these days.

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/02/2398664/

by

Time – Evening of Valentine’s Day. Setting – South Street shopping district. Characters – Peter and his mother.

Mom – Oh! What’s this store? It looks cool!

Peter – That’s Condom Kingdom, Mom. [averts eyes, continues walking]

Mom – What?

Peter – Condom Kingdom. Don’t you see the little sperm painted on the sidewalk?

Mom – Oh! That’s what those are. Let’s go in!

Peter – I don’t want to, Mom; i go in there all of the time.

Mom – Oh, good, just what i wanted to hear.

Peter – No, i mean, … i meant… i mean… my friends are always dragging me in there. [averts eyes again, crosses the street] They have some interesting stuff; did you see the penis pasta in the window.

Mom – Well, we could stop in on our way back.

Peter – Oh, sure, just how i want to spend Valentine’s day: shopping for contraceptives with my mother.

Mom – Point taken.

[they continue walking away and incessantly chattering]

I’d like to add that while i am able to actively talk about condoms and penises with my mother in the middle of the street, i find myself physically unable to tell her about my girlfriend. The closest i came was mentioning her name and then replying to my mother’s query about her: “Oh, it’s a long story. She’s a very nice girl, though.”

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/02/2380124/

by

But, it’s all over now. And, i’m a better blogger for it, i think. For sure, SurvivorBlog managed to garner some of my best content within the last month, but i’d like to think that it’s refocused me a little, and allowed me to work the kinks out of my posting style without inflicting my pissiness on you all of the time. So, … i’m back. :p

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/02/2380006/

by

Did i think i’d win? Well, i’m not sure, but i was sure at one point that i would be among the first to go. My personality isn’t too magnetic, i’m not too agreeable, and i’m not quite as incessantly chatty as all of the other contestants. What turned out as my experience on Survivor2 wound up being wholly influenced by the real life relationship that had blossomed the weekend before sBlog2 began. And so, where typically i might have been a character more like Ryan – loud and abrasive (but loveable!), i wound up immediately sympathizing with the gals (especially Alayna and Jess) as we opened up about our personal lives.

I decided very early on what my voting order would be and why, and i stuck to it with only two corrections. At first i was wholly prepared to give Benjy the boot at the first opportunity, because he seemed to be coming on to randomly talk about something and then disappearing. Then i realized that i was only having such an issue with him because his style of logging was so similar to mine, and after i realized that i softened up and i only wound up voting against him in the tie-breaker against Serra. My other bad call early on was on Bertie, who i just didn’t get. In retrospect i just didn’t have enough attention to pay to her at the beginning, and after we weeded some people out she became one of my favourites.

But, you want more gossip, don’t you? Very well, let’s start out with Tribe two. I would’ve voted off Brad in a hot second because i have Brad issues, so that was a no-brainer. Next would have been Josi, who just didn’t catch my attention. Then would be Marcus, then Dave, Steph, Bertie, AJ, and Serra. I was never voting against Serra and as a result of that i threw her tie-braker into an extra round of tie-break when i voted against Benjy (knowing that Tammy would tie-break against Serra). Steph was a sweetheart, and i wanted her around because she was easy for me to talk to. AJ makes me laugh out loud every day, and i only ever voted against him defensively. Dave is probably the person i wanted to kick off the most; he has a lot in common with me, but i just never felt as though i needed to keep him around to feel like the blog was complete. I wound up curbing my campaign against him because no one else would vote for him.

But, then, i was rather boring too, wasn’t i? Forgive me for being a full-time student working 14 hours a week and rehearsing over 15 hours, and with a brand-new full-time girlfriend. I’m actually surprised that i seemed to be as well liked as i was… but you don’t care about that; you want dirt, right?

I hated Erik. I don’t know why; he just didn’t do anything that piqued my interest. I almost put my fist through the wall when he won immunity for his parody page; he obviously would have been given the boot before Serra or Benjy would even be considered. [Did you know that Erik would have had even more votes against him in his final stand if it wasn’t for the fact that we were trying to break up the Tribe2 Trio? All of us other than Erik who voted for AJ wanted to kick off Erik more!] While i won’t dispute who’s parody was the best, many of the IC’s were decided in truly lackluster fashion by our Peanut Gallery, who never have once collectively lived up to their duties. How many of them read the parodies? Ditto on the Banal-Blog acceptance speeches; Ian’s statement that he thought they were all dull just proved how worthless he was as a peanut [as if we hadn’t figured it out already]. Big appreciation goes out to MJ, Ken, KevRock, the G-man (who i owe a song), Tony, and all the others who actively got in on the action. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Benjy would’ve been the next person i would have voted against, just because i wouldn’t have had the heart to vote off any of the girls. Sorry Benjy! Next off would’ve been… um… well, let me go backwards. I would have never voted against Alayna – i decided early on that she was my favourite logger and i would never vote her off, and told her as much early in the proceedings. Alayna is one of the nicest most genuine people i’ve ever met and i intend to stay friends with her long after the blog ends (though it’s obviously over already for me). The only real alliance i ever formed was with Alayna; that i wouldn’t vote for her and we’d try to protect each other. I don’t know if she would’ve kept following up on her intent, but i certainly would have.

As for the other four – C, Jess, Tammy, and Ryan – i’m just not sure. I think i was very attached to C and Jess, but i never had much time to get to know either of them. Ryan and Tammy are a different matter entirely; i find Tammy entirely amusing and i love the way she fends off attacks on her person, but at the same time i never felt like we ever had any sort of connection other then when we haggled over who would step in for the infamous game of Chinese Checkers. Having said that, i’ll also say that i probably would’ve stuck up for her for a long time. Ryan was the opposite; totally easy to get along with, but his content bored me to tears most of the time. However, Ryan had the uncanny ability to actually tap into his emotions every so often, which Tammy didn’t do much that i noticed. I think when it came down to it, i would have booted Ryan rather than Tammy (, but i might have hung on to Bertie over either of them).

Final words? I had fun! I love all of you people! However, you all managed to vote off more and more of the interesting and opinionated people, leaving us only with the middle of the road. Voting off Serra, who had challenging things to say about love, sex, and relationships, as opposed to Dave, our resident Mr. Nice? Voting off Benjy with his quirkiness and programming skills rather than Ryan, who’s just got the lewd sex stuff going for him? Maybe i come off sounding a bit harsh, but it seems i was the one of the last people consistently attempting to make valid and continuous conversation. Was it mostly about my girlfriend and totally irrelevant? Yes. But, did it always respond to everyone else and try to say something new? Totally. I started the first deep conversation we had; I wonder if we’ll see any more of them.

Ok, that’s enough dish. Good luck to all, and if you vote off Alayna i’m coming to your house with a crowbar.

xoxoxox!

https://crushingkrisis.com/2001/02/2379789/